Finding Meaning in a World So Dark and Unforgiving
The world is a lot right now, no matter which side of the fence you’re on regarding politics, religion, finances, or any other reason you could be on one side versus another. There’s a war going on in Ukraine, the political landscape of many countries is in constant turmoil, the world is still recovering from a global pandemic, and mental health problems have skyrocketed. The sheer amount of stuff you could potentially worry about is enough to push anyone into an existential crisis, including myself. For the last month or so, I have found myself wondering more about life’s meaning, my purpose on this Earth, and quite honestly why it even matters. This can be a dark and lonely place to be. As October comes to an end, I have found a flashlight to really figure out some answers to these questions (at least answers that make sense for me at this time in my life).
Let’s start with the first question: life’s meaning. The real answer: who the fuck knows. Finding the meaning to life is different for everyone, and likely changes depending on the current context of your life. Everyone believes in something, but nobody actually knows what life’s true meaning is. The best part of understanding that there is no answer for this question is that you can decide what is going to be meaningful each and every day. Maybe it’s fostering healthy relationships, building security through finances and work, ensuring mental and physical health is a priority, or simply making time to connect with the earth each day. For me, meaning comes from connecting with myself and those that I love in deep and vulnerable ways and finding a path that can spread this connection with everyone.
This leads me to my purpose on this Earth, knowing that my time here is finite. Leaving a legacy is something that many people want, but are unlikely to achieve on a large scale given the sheer number of people that inhabit this planet. At this time, I believe my purpose is to use my knowledge, compassion, and skills to help make the world just a little bit better, one person at a time. Whether that is through therapy, coaching, parenting, or simply being a member of my Las Vegas community, I want to create little ripples that have the potential to create big change long after I am gone.
Now to my last question: why does it even matter. I have often felt as though I try so hard to make things better, but they still end up going to shit one way or another. This is what has really fueled my struggle with why keep trying when results don’t lead to anything good. I have come to the realization that if I stop trying, regardless of the result, there will be one more voice adding to the apathy that is already plaguing the world. Not trying is self-sabotage in one of its’ greatest forms as it silences our voice and allows for injustice to continue unchecked. The voices in my head are strong when they tell me to give up, but I know that I am stronger. My purpose anchors me in this storm of discouragement and discontent, allowing me to continue onward even when the seas get rough.
If you are also struggling with some of these questions, here are some things you could try:
Make a meaning timeline regarding what you have found meaningful during different stages of your life (I suggest going up by increments of 5 years, so start at age 5 and go up until you hit your current age)
Journal about these questions
Is there a benefit to this meaningless part? What could it be protecting you from?
Do you want THE answer or YOUR answer to these questions about meaning?
What does your religion, political group, family, etc. say about what is meaningful in life? Do you agree with those?
Get clear on your values to help you determine what is important
Differentiate between rules you abide by and your values
Take time to connect with your body
Create a vision for your future that is alignment with your values and life’s purpose. Begin making necessary adjustments to get you where you want to go.
Connect with family and friends
Practice self-compassion
As we all face the stark reality of life’s changes, it is important to remember that you are not alone on this journey. This is a normal (sometimes painful) human experience, so be kind as you explore your own life’s meanings.
